I kissed my kids faces as I put them to sleep tonight; rubbed noses with them as we always do before I end our evening with prayer.
We prayed for daddy who is teaching his class tonight–helping broken men become restored. We prayed for family near and far regarding the pressing or relevant items at hand. We prayed for thankfulness for the day that was given to enjoy activities of play and laughter together.
We prayed for mommy to have strength beyond herself. “Just breathe…” I kept telling myself.
It’s no secret that I’ve been pushing my limits these days when it comes to cramming things into my already busy “mom” schedule. Simply rearing a family as a mother is exhausting, overwhelming at times, and emotionally depleting. Adding to that, building a business/ministry with my husband regarding the pursuits we feel destined to lead is time consuming and soul stretching. Even more, maintaining family, friendships, and careers on top of it is enough to send my head in a tailspin.
Yet, I’m beginning to truly understand a passage which states “with God all things are possible.” (Matthew 19:26)
Many people often ask me how I manage to do everything. The truth is I don’t.
Right now I have two large piles of laundry on the couch, and probably more in the dryer.
There are clean dishes in the dishwasher waiting to be emptied, while a mound of dirty dishes lay stinking in the sink.
My bedroom is strewn with an assortment of books unorganized, clothes that didn’t make the style cut for that day, and shoes that need to find their way back home. Oh, and two random suitcases are standing like soldiers, erect in the middle of my room, thanks to my twins who wrangled them out of the closet again (plus a random tape-measure, foam sleeping pad from recent guests, and a crumpled paper towel all lying on the ground).
I did manage to *mostly* pick up the assortment of toys in the den… wipe down the kitchen counters… and the kitchen table is clean (ahem… because it wasn’t even used today). The floors–cleaned recently, although multiple crumbs from the chocolate cupcakes I let them eat for dessert while they sat at the island counter are visible on the beige tile.
I am behind on #allthethings when it comes to work… need I say more.
Yet here I am, ignoring it all, to simply take a moment and… just breathe.
I go to my spot where I breathe. Writing words that in the moment seem to bleed on the page. Aimlessly writing. Emptying myself from my day. Enjoying the stillness of sleeping babes in the rooms behind me.
I flip my bible to passages of scripture that soothe the tired and weary soul, breathing life back into my weary footsteps. I allow Him to fill my thoughts with the desires of His heart, the fueling of the soul. Words like “He strengthens,” “Endure,” and “I will give you rest,” settles my overwhelmed heart.
I never used to take moments like now to breathe. These moments to rest in His word. To soak in His presence, His goodness, His comfort. I was always too busy to sit and read a passage of scripture. Too busy to pray a quick prayer for help. Too busy to spend any time doing things I love, that give me joy and refuels my inner fuel tank. I justified that there were too many pressing errands, assignments, things to-do or that other priorities needing to get done before I could allow myself to breathe.
Friend, there will always be more to do, especially as a mom. More things to clean up. Put away. Organize. Fix. Plan. We could pack a whole 24 hour day with just M.O.M. items and roles and things that need to be done.
But there is something that is even more important to we need to remember these days. Something that puts our minds, bodies, and souls at rest. SomeOne asking you to just breathe. Right now. For just a moment.
Soon the exhaustion and fatigue will subside to a more normal level. Stress is below its threshold. Walls that were once closing in all around you moments ago will be gone.
Your breathing will return to normal once you allow yourself to just breathe.
So, the question for you is: are you taking time to “just breathe?” What allows your heart and soul to truly breathe?