I’m picking up my kids from preschool last week, and a teacher hollers at me “don’t forget your invite!” as I was already making my way back to the car tripping over toddlers scampering around me.
She runs over to me and gives me this glowing vase filled with sparkles and a stunning little bow on the side.
“What is this? Is there a school event coming up?” I asked.
“Oh no, no,” the teacher replied. “It’s an invite for Gavin to attend Santana’s birthday party.”
I looked at it bewildered but quickly said, “Oh, wow thanks!” as I made my way out the door. I have no idea, mind you, who Santana is except to know that she is apparently in Gavin’s preschool classroom. I hear a comment behind me from the teachers mingling, “the things these mom’s come up with on Pinterest these days, sheesh!”
The unexpected invite.
I’m admiring this beautiful creation once I get home, filled with sparkles, shimmering with the fake candle votive lit inside. This invite is quite the eye catcher. The theme was Tinkerbell, which is actually my kid’s favorite movie series (yes, my twin boys LOVE Tinkerbell and her fairy friends. Don’t judge, your boys would TOTALLY love them as well).
I was in a bit of stunned shock. We were invited by a family unbeknownst to us to come to their Tinkerbell party to play Glo Mini Golf with the kids. Wow!
Now, I can hear the mix of different voices from you all out there. The comments catapulting out your mind almost instinctively by the look of this invite and the type of encounter this scenario plays into.
“There she goes making all us mama’s look bad by throwing the party of the century.”
“I could never make an invite as amazing as that! Darn Pinterest!”
“That is so weird…why would she invite the whole class of parents she doesn’t know?”
“I am so not going. Why would I go? I don’t even know this girl!”
“Ugh, now I really have to make my kid’s party look good coming up.”
“I wonder if she did this because she felt bad leaving anyone out?”
“I wonder if she did this because her daughter doesn’t have many friends?”
Horrible thoughts I know.
I’m sure there’s more.
Every comment I’m sharing popped into my own head as well. Shame on me. Yep. I’m not always “thinking happy thoughts” about every situation I encounter, I’m human… not a fairy.
Yet, I started to see a different side and beauty to this astounding well thought out invite. The craft that was put into it and the love surrounding this little glass jar of wonder.
Beginning to dwell on the positive aspects of this invite, I placed myself in this mama’s shoes and decided to see it from a different angle. An angle of bridging the friendship gap with one another instead of always staying committed to our own tribes—keeping our distance from one another.
Perhaps this is not the original intention of this invite, to bridge this gap, but I really see this gesture as a stance to build community and friendship with those not already in their current mix or circle of friends.
With that, I absolutely love this unexpected invite and what it means to me! Silencing the lies of negativity surrounding this little jar, I could see a fresh new light and meaning to it.
I am going to make every effort to attend this party and meet this fabulous mama I don’t even know with her little girl who I bet is a total doll with her fairy princess outfit that I’m pretty sure she will be wearing. I will embrace her with a warm smile, tight hug, and whisper to her, “You are an amazing mama!”
We compare and judge one another so much. It’s our instinct. It’s much of what initially comes through our heads if we aren’t taking those thoughts captive.
Instead of bitter jealousy, let’s embrace each other with appreciation and love for where we are at in motherhood. Let us celebrate our differences and enjoy what each mama has to offer, such as the: Pinterest perfect recipe mom, fitness nut mom, in-style mom, messy house don’t care mom, clean freak don’t squeak mom, and all the mom’s in between.
Let us not believe in the lie that we aren’t enough if we don’t make the perfect invite, and invite everyone under the sun.
Let us not believe in the lie that we are better or more worthy if we make that perfect invite, and invite everyone under the sun.
Be you. Be uniquely you. And recognize your limits and capabilities.
Push off the lies. Don’t worry about what others will think of you and your mothering style. Don’t be pressured to be a certain type of mom or woman or person that society pushes you to be.
Just be you. Embrace who you are. Embrace who others are. Let that simply be enough.